My wife Dorothy’s Uncle Derek reckons that he, in effect, bought the parrot off his crooked father-in-law, the veteran jewel-thief Tommy Twinkle Toes (that really was what the Sunday paper had called him, back in the day: ‘Tommy Twinkle Toes’). Derek took in the parrot when Tommy was arrested and also lent Tommy quite a bit of money towards the costs of his defence lawyer. After Tommy was found (very) guilty, Derek visited him in the jail and asked him what he was to do with the parrot. Tommy begged him to keep it, saying it that would be a consolation to him, in his lonely cell, to know that the bird was in a good home.
Continue readingMichael Bloor
Wild Bill’s Thursday Afternoon Show by Michael Bloor
‘Hi there and welcome to The Thursday Afternoon Show on Radio Sherwood, with me your humble host and Turntable Operator, Wild Bill Hilcock…
[a burst of Wild Bill’s personal jingle]
‘Not content with simply playing you The Very Best of The Seventies, we also have the latest instalment of our weekly feature: our “Meet the Muse” live interview. This week we’ll be talking to Jeanette Brailsford, who as a sweet seventeen year-old, became the immortal muse of Dogsbreath Donovan, the onlie begetter of that great seventies hit, “Jeanie Baby”…
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The Rime of the Globalised Mariner. In Six Parts (with bonus track from a chorus of Greek Shippers) by Michael Bloor
First Published in Sociology, 47(1): 30-50, 2013 doi: 10.1177/00380385112448568
(Editor Note: Due to some slop dished out by WP, we have decided to show a better looking version of this fine article, which first appeared on New Years Day–LS)
Part One
(Another Edit note: The parenthetical material in darker font corresponds with the material above it; “call and response” is the theatrical term.)
It is a global Mariner,
And he stoppeth one of three.
‘By thy long grey beard and glittering eye,
Now wherefore stopp’st thou me?
(A globalised Mariner
meeteth three gallants
outside a shopping centre
and detaineth one.)
‘The centre’s doors are opened wide,
And Bourdieu got it right:
Consumption lends distinction.
So get you out my sight.’
(The Consumer protesteth
against detention outside
the shopping mall.)
He holds him with his glittering eye –
No Big Issue 1 sale is sought,
But fifty yards from B&Q
The would-be Consumer’s caught.
(The Consumer is spell-
bound by the mariner and
constrained to hear his tale.)
So spake the doleful mariner,
Transfixing with his e’e,
In fluent, graphic English –
The language of the sea.
(Proficiency in English is a
requirement of a seafaring
career.)
‘I had no wish to work on ships –
Filipinos know it’s hard –
Mouths were many, jobs were scarce,
From birth my life was marr’d.
(The Mariner telleth of early
hardships and how he and
his parents were cheated by
the maritime colleges and
the crewing agents.)
‘From green island homes we travel,
As mariner, nurse, or maid,
And remit 3 to our loved ones
The pittance we get paid.
‘Father scraped up money
For training college fees –
A scam of the local senator,
Whose throat I’d gladly seize.
(Filipino maritime training
institutions are often
controlled by persons with
powerful political
connections.)
‘The college had no equipment,
Just endless, pointless drill,
No qualifications either –
The news made my father ill.
(The academic training
often follows a military
model and is of poor
quality. And it does not
qualify cadets for
certificates of seafarer
competency without
additional practical
experience – ‘sea time’.
Most colleges fail to
arrange ‘sea time’ for their
cadets.)
‘Course passes gained no certificates,
Without some time at sea.
There was no ship to serve on,
But the senator had his fee.
‘Father paid a crewing agent:
Yet another fee required,
But at least I’d get a berth,
And that’s what we desired.
(Many ship operators out-
source crew recruitment
and employment to
specialist crewing agencies
with offices in the major
labour supply countries.
Cadets graduating from
maritime colleges must
pass a basic safety training
course before they can go
to sea. The courses are
usually conducted at
specialist training
institutions with requisite
equipment such as
lifeboats. State regulatory
agencies inspect the
training institutions to
ensure the requisite
equipment is present, but
not that it is used.)
‘The agent sent me to train then
At a dismal-looking place
More fees and little learned,
Sad repetition of my case.
‘A lifeboat stood on davits,
By a creek filled-up with mud.
“For audit purposes only”,
That pristine lifeboat stood.
‘There’s so many schools for training –
Why’d the agent send me there?
The training was quite useless –
Why didn’t that agent care?
‘It seemed he got a “rebate”
(kickback to you and me)
For every trainee sent there,
A percentage of their fee.
(Corrupt crewing agents NOTE WORK FROM PRINT TO FINISH
distort the seafarer training market)
‘They issued my certificates,
But their paper had a price:
My father’s hard-earned money,
Stolen once, then twice.
‘Ever since it’s been the same:
When I come home from sea,
The agent wants another course,
And I must pay the fee’.
Specialist short courses
must be taken to allow
employment in particular
trades, such as tankers.
Usually, the seafarer must
pay the course fee.
[Enter Chorus of Greek Shippers]
‘O woe to us, and to our ships,
But what are we to do?
The wages they are paying now,
Won’t draw a young Greek crew.
‘So we take these global mariners,
Who’re really up for it,
But they can’t begin to work a ship:
Their training’s frankly s**t!
(Ship operators moan that
international standards of
seafarer training are not
being properly enforced.)
‘Someone, somewhere, should sort it out,
We’ve really had enough:
Inspect and close the colleges,
It’s time for getting tough!’
PART II
Consumer groaned to Mariner:
‘So you each believe the same!
But if all think your training’s s**t
Then, truly, who’s to blame?’
‘Our union said, there is a law –
A real law, no invention –
That lays down training standards,
An international convention.
(The Mariner relateth that
there are international
standards on seafarer
training.)
‘Government should enforce it,
End the bribing and the feigning,
Close-down the useless paper-mills
And give us decent training’.
(But these international
standards rely on national
enforcement.)
‘Yes, yes’, the Chorus chorused,
‘Our ships need well-trained crew.’
‘So what went wrong?’ Consumer asked,
But the Mariner hardly knew.
‘There are no simple answers,’
Voice grated, knife on rock,
‘The true path’s no open highway,
Good governance no wind-up clock.’
A gaunt figure stepped among them:
He gave each a piercing look.
His boots were worn, his cloak was stained,
And he bore a calf-bound book.
‘Who art thou?’ they cried in wonder,
‘And what thing’s your burden there?’
‘I’m the Inspector,’ spake the stranger,
‘And the Law’s my burden fair.’
(An Inspector calls.)
The Chorus shrank and muttered,
The Mariner downed his e’e.
‘I’ve heard tell of you,’ he whispered,
‘As have all who sail the sea.
‘You come aboard, unheralded,
You seek out the rusting hulks:
You cow the cruel masters,
Ships’ agents get the sulks.’
Consumer viewed Inspector,
Eyes lit with wild surmise:
‘It’s up to you to punish,
Right wrongs, and nail their lies?’
‘In truth, that is my duty –
The goal for all my kind –
But the journey is a long one,
And the road’s not paved, nor signed.
‘Those who inspect the colleges
In each poor country of the Earth:
They’re government employees
And are not paid their worth.
‘The owner is a man of power,
The inspector – he is not,
The one dines in his castle,
The other in his cot.
‘The inspector has a check-list,
To work through, line by line.
If a lifeboat’s at the college,
Then it gets a tick – that’s fine.
‘We know it can’t be launched:
It’s to be ticked, naught more.
Poor men must heed the letter,
Not the substance, of the law.’
(The Inspector concurreth
with the mere lip-service
maritime colleges pay to
international training
regulations, but believeth
that the local inspectors are
powerless to obtain fuller
compliance.)
The mariner had silent stood,
Hands clenched and visage pale,
Eyeing the Inspector,
As he ground out his tale.
‘I thank you’, cried the mariner,
‘Now I know the bitter worst:
No remedy in law books –
My mates and I are cursed.’
The Greeks had been quite nervous
While yet the Inspector spoke,
But confidently dealt with
The Mariner and such-like folk:
‘Don’t blame the law, nor malice,
Nor trade that’s getting slack,
Global economic forces
Stapped these burdens to your back
‘Colleges could train you better –
With lifeboats working too –
But higher costs would close ‘em down,
Then where’d we find a crew?’
(The ship operators see
poor-quality training as an
economic consequence of
the seafarers’ need for
cheap training.)
The Inspector laughed most harshly,
And turned to face the Greeks:
‘He who looks for truth
Must beware of that he seeks.
‘Good training’s too expensive:
The poor can’t pay the fee.
You state the matter clearly,
And I cannot but agree.
‘Yet I can well remember
When companies paid the fees,
Time-Past – they paid for training,
Invested in their employees.
(The Inspector recalleth that
40 years ago, it was
commonplace for ship
operators to pay for
seafarer training through
cadetships and
apprenticeships.)
‘You complain of training standards,
Cackling like geese
You want action to be taken,
But you don’t pay a penny piece.
‘It seems to me, hypocrisy,
When the poor turn-out their pockets,
To criticize their training,
While adding up your profits.’
PART III
The Chorus blushed and shuffled,
But still they stood their ground.
They’d got their MBAs,
They knew their case was sound:
‘You’re talking of the past,
Dim, distant days of yore,
We don’t train our seafarers –
We don’t employ ‘em any more!’
Consumer quizzed the Chorus:
‘You don’t employ your crew??’ –
‘Our labour’s all outsourced,
‘The late-modern thing to do.
(The Chorus confirmeth the
Mariner’s tale that crewing
agencies, not ship
operators, employ
seafarers. Agencies then
contract with operators to
supply crews with the
requisite qualifications.)
‘If a shipper paid for training,
He’d have an extra cost,
He’d be under-cut by others –
His business would be lost.
‘Pay for training? Better wages??
Remember shipping’s quite anarchic:
We’d love to be more generous
But you cannot buck the market.’
The Inspector gave a mirthless smile:
‘The market’s always cited
As a sovereign power and reason
Why wrongs cannot be righted.
‘But the remedy is simple here:
The flag-State of every nation
Shall charge a levy on each ship,
Paid at each ship’s registration.
(The Inspector proposeth a
training levy to be paid
when each ship is
registered by the flag-State.
See Afterword.)
‘The levy would pay all training costs,
A burden shared without distortion.
It would pay for good inspections too –
No need for doubts or caution.’
The Mariner did slowly nod:
‘The scheme would work – I see –
My last ship flew Mongolia’s flag,
For a three-thousand-dollar fee.’
Although Mongolia is 850
miles from the sea, the
Mongolian People’s
Revolutionary Party
granted a license in 2003,
to a Mr Chong Kov Sen, a
Singaporean businessman,
to operate the Mongolian
Ship Registry. Mr Chong
previously operated the
Cambodia Registry under
license until 2002, when
the license was withdrawn
following international
protests at Cambodia’s
failure to police its ships. In
2008, 73 ships were flying
the Mongolian flag.
‘Mongolia?’ quizzed our Consumer,
‘That’s surely rather queer?’
‘Not really’, saith the Inspector,
‘Some think a proper flag too dear.
‘Each ship is like a piece
Of far-off, sovereign soil –
Its flag denotes allegiance,
Republican or royal.
‘The flag-State has a duty,
Be the country rich or poor,
To check each ship is ship-shape –
As laid down in the law.
‘But flags can be commodities,
And flags can be for rent,
To businessmen and lawyers,
Who’re out on profit bent.
‘When ships are policed badly,
Their seafarers should beware.
Policing ships for profit
Is a mighty strange affair.
‘Some run their business well,
Some run it as a racket,
With only one objective:
To make themselves a packet.
An OECD report states that
‘a significant percentage of
total vessel operating costs
could be saved by sub-
standard operations’
(OECD 1996: 27).
‘Now, compliance is expensive,
So compliance is a sham
When the flag a shipper flies
Really doesn’t give a damn.
‘A shipper heeds his costs,
A shipper looks to save,
But if he flies a cut-price flag,
Consequences can be grave.
‘Ships that fly a proper flag,
And meet their obligations,
Incur much extra cost
To comply with regulations.
(Thomas Gresham, a
sixteenth-century
Chancellor of the
Exchequer, found it was
impossible to improve the
quality of the English
coinage, by simply issuing
good quality coins. People
hoarded the good coinage.
So it was necessary to also
withdraw the clipped and
debased coins from
circulation. Hence
Gresham’s Law: ‘Bad
money drives out good’.)
‘If they wanted well-found ships,
And skilled, contented crews,
They should have thought to ask us,
Or given us some clues.
‘Truth is: they don’t want “good,”
Or freight rates getting steep.
We skimp, they save –
Truth is: they’re wanting “cheap.”
The Inspector sighed in turn,
‘Some charterers do care,
Oil majors first and foremost,
Others – rather rare.
The Oil Companies
International Marine Forum
(OCIMF) has set up and
funded its own private
inspectorate, SIRE, to
ensure the seaworthiness of
tankers under charter.
Those tankers deemed
satisfactory on inspection
can expect more business
and better terms from the
oil majors, eager to avoid
the bad publicity of marine
pollution incidents.)
‘Oil majors don’t like bad headlines
When tankers hit the rocks
And oil pollutes the beaches
Because the ships are crocks.
‘The public doesn’t like to see
Seabirds black with oil;
Alas, for all the tanker crews,
The public doesn’t care at all.
‘So the tankers get inspected
With much resource and care,
But the crews of all the rest
Make do with me…and prayer.’
PART IV
The Mariner then spoke up:
‘Christian, Buddhist, Hindu, Turk,
Many pray who sail the seas,
But their prayers concern their work.
‘We do not fear a foundering –
Hull pierced, stove in, or rent.
Such a thing may happen,
But it’s a very rare event.
‘Pirates may seize the ship,
And hold us on foreign soil,
But what we fear most is different:
It’s the endless, grinding toil.
‘Each and every ship we join,
Seems there’s fewer crew,
An officer gone, a rating gone,
But there’s still their jobs to do.
(Increasingly, ship operators
have been seeking to save
crewing costs by reducing
the number of watch-
keeping officers. Where
second officers have been
dispensed with, then
watches must alternate
between the master and the
first officer (mate),
although each of them has
many other duties to
perform. An OECD
(2001a) report instances a
saving of $37,000 pa by
under-manning a 20-year-
old 30,000 dwt bulk carrier
by two crew.)
‘The master now must take a watch,
Though there’s paperwork aplenty.
So many crew have disappeared,
The vessel’s almost empty.
‘The master’s nodding on the bridge,
His tired eyes are red.
He’s still to call Head Office,
Before he gets to bed.
‘The mate then takes a watch,
Though it’s two days since he slept –
Problems with the cargo –
But his watch must still be kept
‘The master’s nodding on the bridge,
His tired eyes are red.
He’s still to call Head Office,
Before he gets to bed.
‘The mate then takes a watch,
Though it’s two days since he slept –
Problems with the cargo –
But his watch must be kept
‘Turnabout, the two must watch,
There is no other way,
Six hours on, six off,
Twelve hours in every day.
‘In sickness and in health,
Each watch they duly take,
Dog-tired, red-eyed, grey-faced,
Four months, four months, without a break.
‘No gentle couch our cabin:
The ship is pitching in the waves,
There’s engine noise, vibration,
Yet we sleep the sleep of babes.
‘Too soon, too soon we’re wakened,
We scarcely catch our breath.
An ignoble thing, this tiredness –
As if we slowly bleed to death.’
Part V
As ever when the Mariner spoke,
The Greeks did swell with pride:
‘There is no law that’s broken there,
There’s nothing for us to hide.’
‘You surely lie,’ Consumer cried,
‘I know little of the sea,
But to have a master standing watch –
That’s folly, plain to me.’
The grim inspector then did speak:
‘In truth, they break no law.
The law itself is here at fault –
Therein we find the flaw.
‘The law on Minimum Manning
Lays down for every ship
The crew that must be carried
On each and every trip.
‘What is the minimum manning?
This is what we’re taught:
It’s the smallest competent crew
To bring a stricken vessel safe to port.
(In fact the maximum
number of daily hours of
work for watch-keepers is
specified by the IMO as 14
hours, and the maximum
number of weekly hours is
91.)
‘To make that stricken vessel safe,
Huge effort they’ll expend,
Yet must they slave thus daily?
Til their contract’s at an end?’
Consumer scratched his head:
‘If some members of the crew
Exceed twelve hours each day,
Surely that’s illegal too?’
‘We falsify our working hours’,
Replied the old seadog,
‘To keep the owners happy,
Each day, we flog the log.’
(Falsification of working
hours is so widespread in
the industry that it has
entered everyday slang as
‘flogging the log.’)
‘Then change the minimum manning law –
No more idle chatter –
Require crews to be larger,
It seems a simple matter.’
(Consumer doth not
understand why the flag-
States at IMO do not
change the international
legislation to provide
adequate crewing numbers,
allowing shorter hours.)
The mariner sighed and shrugged.
The Inspector took-up the tale:
‘Flag-States must vote the change,
Or else the measure fails.
‘Flag-States that exist for profit,
And take the operators’ gold,
They can’t increase the crewing costs –
They’ve reputations to uphold.
‘The flag with the greatest tonnage
Flies o’er the Panama Isthmus,
When Panama votes for change,
Then turkeys’ll vote for Christmas.’
Part VI
[All in chorus: …]
‘So come all you kind consumers,
Who the honey’d wine have sipped,
Take pity on the mariner,
Beware how your goods are shipped.
(It is suggested that public
concern for seafarers’
welfare might act in the
same way as public concern
about marine pollution and
be transmitted down the
supply chain from
charterers to ship operators.
Operators who could
‘brand’ their vessels as well
crewed could then
command premium freight
rates.)
‘The crews are outsourced workers,
A study in dejection –
Casualised, long hours, poor training –
And the law is no protection.
‘If charterers thought the public cared
How seafarers are mistreated,
They’d pass the message down the line:
“Our consumers are quite heated.
“It’s bad for our public image,
Like seabirds and pollution,
So get your act together,
And find a true solution.
“We’ll pay your higher freight rates,
If you’ll deploy more crew.
Or we’ll contract your opposition –
See if they know what to do.”
‘So the shippers get the higher rates,
Increase the crews and cut the hours,
Strike the flag of Panama,
And so, at last, they smell of flowers.
‘One day it really just might happen,
A fairy tale come true,
It’s even very possible,
They’d employ and train the crew!’
For an ‘Afterword’ describing in detail the political economy of the global shipping industry, issues of seafarer training, industry regulation and enforcement, please refer to the original publication in the journal ‘Sociology’.
Michael Bloor
An Imagined Final Conversation at Polhoegda, near Oslo, 1930 by Michael Bloor
On June 17th 1896, a bizarre encounter occurred in Franz Josef Land, in the Arctic wastes. Fridtjof Nansen (1861-1930), the Norwegian scientist and arctic explorer, met Major Frederick Jackson (1860-1938), the leader of a British arctic expedition. Their meeting was an incredible piece of luck: Nansen and his companion, Johansen, had left their ship, the Fram, more than a year previously to try and reach the pole, and were presumed – by Major Jackson and the general public – to have died. They had, in fact, survived an arctic winter on walrus blubber and polar bear meat, but would surely have perished eventually had it not been for that chance meeting. Nansen later wrote that both gentlemen raised their hats and said ‘How do you do?’ Nansen and Jackson each went on to lead extraordinary lives.
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Menopausal Male Bombshell by Michael Bloor
Alan had won second prize in a writers’ magazine poetry competition for his ‘Ballad of the Menopausal Male.’ The postman had just delivered the prize, a copy of The Chambers Thesaurus (5th edition).
As Alan hefted the thesaurus in his hand, he recalled that, in what used to be termed The Dark Ages, poets were feted and richly cosseted in the courts of Kings and Great Lords. When Gunnlaug the Worm-Tongue* (‘worm’ as in snake), the great Icelandic skald (= poet) was presented to the English king, Ethelred the Unready, Gunnlaug chanted four lines in praise of the king and was rewarded with a gold-thread-embroided, fur-lined cloak and was invited to spend the entire winter at the royal court.
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The Rime of the Globalised Mariner. In Six Parts (with bonus tracks from a chorus of Greek shippers) by Michael Bloor
(Today we officially open the site, which has been open for ages, with something quite different and particularly well done by Michael Bloor)
First Published in Sociology, 47(1): 30-50, 2013 doi: 10.1177/00380385112448568
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PART I It is a global Mariner, And he stoppeth one of three. ‘By thy long grey beard and glittering eye, Now wherefore stopp’st thou me? ‘The centre’s doors are opened wide, And Bourdieu got it right: Consumption lends distinction. So get you out my sight.’ He holds him with his glittering eye – No Big Issue1 sale is sought, But fifty yards from B&Q The would-be Consumer’s caught. So spake the doleful mariner, Transfixing with his e’e, In fluent, graphic English – The language of the sea. ‘I had no wish to work on ships – Filipinos know it’s hard – Mouths were many, jobs were scarce, From birth my life was marr’d. ‘From green island homes we travel, As mariner, nurse, or maid, And remit3 to our loved ones The pittance we get paid. ‘Father scraped up money For training college fees – A scam of the local senator, Whose throat I’d gladly seize. ‘The college had no equipment, Just endless, pointless drill, No qualifications either – The news made my father ill. ‘Course passes gained no certificates, Without some time at sea. There was no ship to serve on, But the senator had his fee. ‘Father paid a crewing agent: Yet another fee required, But at least I’d get a berth, And that’s what we desired. ‘The agent sent me to train then At a dismal-looking place More fees and little learned, Sad repetition of my case. ‘A lifeboat stood on davits, By a creek filled-up with mud. “For audit purposes only”, That pristine lifeboat stood. ‘There’s so many schools for training – Why’d the agent send me there? The training was quite useless – Why didn’t that agent care? ‘It seemed he got a “rebate” (kickback to you and me) For every trainee sent there, A percentage of their fee. ‘They issued my certificates, But their paper had a price: My father’s hard-earned money, Stolen once, then twice. ‘Ever since it’s been the same: When I come home from sea, The agent wants another course, And I must pay the fee’. [Enter Chorus of Greek Shippers] ‘O woe to us, and to our ships, But what are we to do? The wages they are paying now, Won’t draw a young Greek crew. ‘So we take these global mariners, Who’re really up for it, But they can’t begin to work a ship: Their training’s frankly s**t! ‘Someone, somewhere, should sort it out, We’ve really had enough: Inspect and close the colleges, It’s time for getting tough!’ |
A globalised Mariner meeteth three gallants outside a shopping centre and detaineth one. The Consumer protesteth against detention outside the shopping mall. The Consumer is spell-bound by the mariner and constrained to hear his tale. Proficiency in English is a requirement of a seafaring career. The Mariner telleth of early hardships and how he and his parents were cheated by the maritime colleges and the crewing agents. Filipino maritime training institutions are often controlled by persons with powerful political connections. The academic training often follows a military model and is of poor quality. And it does not qualify cadets for certificates of seafarer competency without additional practical experience – ‘sea time’. Most colleges fail to arrange ‘sea time’ for their cadets. Many ship operators out-source crew recruitment and employment to specialist crewing agencies with offices in the major labour supply countries. Cadets graduating from maritime colleges must pass a basic safety training course before they can go to sea. The courses are usually conducted at specialist training institutions with requisite equipment such as lifeboats. State regulatory agencies inspect the training institutions to ensure the requisite equipment is present, but not that it is used. Corrupt crewing agents distort the seafarer training market Specialist short courses must be taken to allow employment in particular trades, such as tankers. Usually, the seafarer must pay the course fee. Ship operators moan that international standards of seafarer training are not being properly enforced. |
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PART II Consumer groaned to Mariner: ‘So you each believe the same! But if all think your training’s s**t Then, truly, who’s to blame?’ ‘Our union said, there is a law – A real law, no invention – That lays down training standards, An international convention. ‘Government should enforce it, End the bribing and the feigning, Close-down the useless paper-mills And give us decent training’. ‘Yes, yes’, the Chorus chorused, ‘Our ships need well-trained crew.’ ‘So what went wrong?’ Consumer asked, But the Mariner hardly knew. ‘There are no simple answers,’ Voice grated, knife on rock, ‘The true path’s no open highway, Good governance no wind-up clock.’ A gaunt figure stepped among them: He gave each a piercing look. His boots were worn, his cloak was stained, And he bore a calf-bound book. ‘Who art thou?’ they cried in wonder, ‘And what thing’s your burden there?’ ‘I’m the Inspector,’ spake the stranger, ‘And the Law’s my burden fair.’ The Chorus shrank and muttered, The Mariner downed his e’e. ‘I’ve heard tell of you,’ he whispered, ‘As have all who sail the sea. ‘You come aboard, unheralded, You seek out the rusting hulks: You cow the cruel masters, Ships’ agents get the sulks.’ Consumer viewed Inspector, Eyes lit with wild surmise: ‘It’s up to you to punish, Right wrongs, and nail their lies?’ ‘In truth, that is my duty – The goal for all my kind – But the journey is a long one, And the road’s not paved, nor signed. ‘Those who inspect the colleges In each poor country of the Earth: They’re government employees And are not paid their worth. ‘The owner is a man of power, The inspector – he is not, The one dines in his castle, The other in his cot. ‘The inspector has a check-list, To work through, line by line. If a lifeboat’s at the college, Then it gets a tick – that’s fine. ‘We know it can’t be launched: It’s to be ticked, naught more. Poor men must heed the letter, Not the substance, of the law.’ The mariner had silent stood, Hands clenched and visage pale, Eyeing the Inspector, As he ground out his tale. ‘I thank you’, cried the mariner, ‘Now I know the bitter worst: No remedy in law books – My mates and I are cursed.’ The Greeks had been quite nervous While yet the Inspector spoke, But confidently dealt with The Mariner and such-like folk: ‘Don’t blame the law, nor malice, Nor trade that’s getting slack, Global economic forces Strapped these burdens to your back. ‘Colleges could train you better – With lifeboats working too – But higher costs would close ‘em down, Then where’d we find a crew?’ The Inspector laughed most harshly, And turned to face the Greeks: ‘He who looks for truth Must beware of that he seeks. ‘Good training’s too expensive: The poor can’t pay the fee. You state the matter clearly, And I cannot but agree. ‘Yet I can well remember When companies paid the fees, Time-Past – they paid for training, Invested in their employees. ‘You complain of training standards, Cackling like geese You want action to be taken, But you don’t pay a penny piece. ‘It seems to me, hypocrisy, When the poor turn-out their pockets, To criticize their training, While adding up your profits.’ |
The Mariner relateth that there are international standards on seafarer training. But these international standards rely on national enforcement. An Inspector calls.
The Inspector concurreth with the mere lip-service maritime colleges pay to international training regulations, but believeth that the local inspectors are powerless to obtain fuller compliance. The ship operators see poor-quality training as an economic consequence of the seafarers’ need for cheap training. The Inspector recalleth that 40 years ago, it was commonplace for ship operators to pay for seafarer training through cadetships and apprenticeships. |
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Part III The Chorus blushed and shuffled, But still they stood their ground. They’d got their MBAs, They knew their case was sound: ‘You’re talking of the past, Dim, distant days of yore, We don’t train our seafarers – We don’t employ ‘em any more!’ Consumer quizzed the Chorus: ‘You don’t employ your crew??’ – ‘Our labour’s all outsourced, ‘The late-modern thing to do. ‘If a shipper paid for training, He’d have an extra cost, He’d be under-cut by others – His business would be lost. ‘Pay for training? Better wages?? Remember shipping’s quite anarchic: We’d love to be more generous But you cannot buck the market.’ The Inspector gave a mirthless smile: ‘The market’s always cited As a sovereign power and reason Why wrongs cannot be righted. ‘But the remedy is simple here: The flag-State of every nation Shall charge a levy on each ship, Paid at each ship’s registration. ‘The levy would pay all training costs, A burden shared without distortion. It would pay for good inspections too – No need for doubts or caution.’ The Mariner did slowly nod: ‘The scheme would work – I see – My last ship flew Mongolia’s flag, For a three-thousand-dollar fee.’ ‘Mongolia?’ quizzed our Consumer, ‘That’s surely rather queer?’ ‘Not really’, saith the Inspector, ‘Some think a proper flag too dear. ‘Each ship is like a piece Of far-off, sovereign soil – Its flag denotes allegiance, Republican or royal. ‘The flag-State has a duty, Be the country rich or poor, To check each ship is ship-shape – As laid down in the law. ‘But flags can be commodities, And flags can be for rent, To businessmen and lawyers, Who’re out on profit bent. ‘When ships are policed badly, Their seafarers should beware. Policing ships for profit Is a mighty strange affair. ‘Some run their business well, Some run it as a racket, With only one objective: To make themselves a packet. ‘Now, compliance is expensive, So compliance is a sham When the flag a shipper flies Really doesn’t give a damn. ‘A shipper heeds his costs, A shipper looks to save, But if he flies a cut-price flag, Consequences can be grave. ‘Ships that fly a proper flag, And meet their obligations, Incur much extra cost To comply with regulations. ‘They’re under-cut, bankrupted, bust, When complying as they should. There’s an iron law all must obey: Bad ships drive out the good.’ The Chorus sighed and scuffed their feet: ‘What the Inspector says is true, But the fault is not all ours – Ship charterers are guilty too. ‘If they wanted well-found ships, And skilled, contented crews, They should have thought to ask us, Or given us some clues. ‘Truth is: they don’t want “good,” Or freight rates getting steep. We skimp, they save – Truth is: they’re wanting “cheap.” The Inspector sighed in turn, ‘Some charterers do care, Oil majors first and foremost, Others – rather rare. ‘Inspectors board all tankers – For days, they sniff around – Ensuring chartered ships Are those that pass as sound ‘Oil majors don’t like bad headlines When tankers hit the rocks And oil pollutes the beaches Because the ships are crocks. ‘The public doesn’t like to see Seabirds black with oil; Alas, for all the tanker crews, The public doesn’t care at all. ‘So the tankers get inspected With much resource and care, But the crews of all the rest Make do with me…and prayer.’ |
The Chorus confirmeth the Mariner’s tale that crewing agencies, not ship operators, employ seafarers. Agencies then contract with operators to supply crews with the requisite qualifications. The Inspector proposeth a training levy to be paid when each ship is registered by the flag-State. See Afterword. Although Mongolia is 850 miles from the sea, the Mongolian People’s Revolutionary Party granted a license in 2003, to a Mr Chong Kov Sen, a Singaporean businessman, to operate the Mongolian Ship Registry. Mr Chong previously operated the Cambodia Registry under license until 2002, when the license was withdrawn following international protests at Cambodia’s failure to police its ships. In 2008, 73 ships were flying the Mongolian flag. An OECD report states that ‘a significant percentage of total vessel operating costs could be saved by sub-standard operations’ (OECD 1996: 27). Thomas Gresham, a sixteenth-century Chancellor of the Exchequer, found it was impossible to improve the quality of the English coinage, by simply issuing good quality coins. People hoarded the good coinage. So it was necessary to also withdraw the clipped and debased coins from circulation. Hence Gresham’s Law: ‘Bad money drives out good’. The Oil Companies International Marine Forum (OCIMF) has set up and funded its own private inspectorate, SIRE, to ensure the seaworthiness of tankers under charter. Those tankers deemed satisfactory on inspection can expect more business and better terms from the oil majors, eager to avoid the bad publicity of marine pollution incidents. |
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PART IV The Mariner then spoke up: ‘Christian, Buddhist, Hindu, Turk, Many pray who sail the seas, But their prayers concern their work. ‘We do not fear a foundering – Hull pierced, stove in, or rent. Such a thing may happen, But it’s a very rare event. ‘Pirates may seize the ship, And hold us on foreign soil, But what we fear most is different: It’s the endless, grinding toil. ‘Each and every ship we join, Seems there’s fewer crew, An officer gone, a rating gone, But there’s still their jobs to do. ‘The master now must take a watch, Though there’s paperwork aplenty. So many crew have disappeared, The vessel’s almost empty. ‘The master’s nodding on the bridge, His tired eyes are red. He’s still to call Head Office, Before he gets to bed. ‘The mate then takes a watch, Though it’s two days since he slept – Problems with the cargo – But his watch must still be kept. ‘Turnabout, the two must watch, There is no other way, Six hours on, six off, Twelve hours in every day. ‘In sickness and in health, Each watch they duly take, Dog-tired, red-eyed, grey-faced, Four months, four months, without a break. ‘No gentle couch our cabin: The ship is pitching in the waves, There’s engine noise, vibration, Yet we sleep the sleep of babes. ‘Too soon, too soon we’re wakened, We scarcely catch our breath. An ignoble thing, this tiredness – As if we slowly bleed to death.’ |
Increasingly, ship operators have been seeking to save crewing costs by reducing the number of watch-keeping officers. Where second officers have been dispensed with, then watches must alternate between the master and the first officer (mate), although each of them has many other duties to perform. An OECD (2001a) report instances a saving of $37,000 pa by under-manning a 20-year-old 30,000 dwt bulk carrier by two crew. |
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PART V As ever when the Mariner spoke, The Greeks did swell with pride: ‘There is no law that’s broken there, There’s nothing for us to hide.’ ‘You surely lie,’ Consumer cried, ‘I know little of the sea, But to have a master standing watch – That’s folly, plain to me.’ The grim inspector then did speak: ‘In truth, they break no law. The law itself is here at fault – Therein we find the flaw. ‘The law on Minimum Manning Lays down for every ship The crew that must be carried On each and every trip. ‘What is the minimum manning? This is what we’re taught: It’s the smallest competent crew To bring a stricken vessel safe to port. ‘To make that stricken vessel safe, Huge effort they’ll expend, Yet must they slave thus daily? Til their contract’s at an end?’ Consumer scratched his head: ‘If some members of the crew Exceed twelve hours each day, Surely that’s illegal too?’ ‘We falsify our working hours’, Replied the old seadog, ‘To keep the owners happy, Each day, we flog the log.’ ‘Then change the minimum manning law – No more idle chatter – Require crews to be larger, It seems a simple matter.’ The mariner sighed and shrugged. The Inspector took-up the tale: ‘Flag-States must vote the change, Or else the measure fails. ‘Flag-States that exist for profit, And take the operators’ gold, They can’t increase the crewing costs – They’ve reputations to uphold. ‘The flag with the greatest tonnage Flies o’er the Panama Isthmus, When Panama votes for change, Then turkeys’ll vote for Christmas.’ |
In fact the maximum number of daily hours of work for watch-keepers is specified by the IMO as 14 hours, and the maximum number of weekly hours is 91. Falsification of working hours is so widespread in the industry that it has entered everyday slang as ‘flogging the log.’ Consumer doth not understand why the flag-States at IMO do not change the international legislation to provide adequate crewing numbers, allowing shorter hours. |
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Part VI [All in chorus: …] ‘So come all you kind consumers, Who the honey’d wine have sipped, Take pity on the mariner, Beware how your goods are shipped. ‘The crews are outsourced workers, A study in dejection – Casualised, long hours, poor training – And the law is no protection. ‘If charterers thought the public cared How seafarers are mistreated, They’d pass the message down the line: “Our consumers are quite heated. “It’s bad for our public image, Like seabirds and pollution, So get your act together, And find a true solution. “We’ll pay your higher freight rates, If you’ll deploy more crew. Or we’ll contract your opposition – See if they know what to do.” ‘So the shippers get the higher rates, Increase the crews and cut the hours, Strike the flag of Panama, And so, at last, they smell of flowers. ‘One day it really just might happen, A fairy tale come true, It’s even very possible, They’d employ and train the crew!’ |
It is suggested that public concern for seafarers’ welfare might act in the same way as public concern about marine pollution and be transmitted down the supply chain from charterers to ship operators. Operators who could ‘brand’ their vessels as well crewed could then command premium freight rates. |
For an ‘Afterword’ describing in detail the political economy of the global shipping industry, issues of seafarer training, industry regulation and enforcement, please refer to the original publication in the journal ‘Sociology’.
Michael Boor (he of the image)
Whatever happened to solidarity by Michael Bloor
(Note–Not everything this month before we go public is a rerun; and today we bring you a fresh one by our friend, Michael Bloor–LA)
Andy and Davie were on their usual walk, along the banks of the Allanwater as far as the wooden footbridge, and then back again. They were discussing Scotland’s nail-biting victory last week over the Danes, sending the Scots to the World Cup Finals for the first time since 1998. Andy was English and had little interest in football, but he’d been deeply impressed by the tremendous, spontaneous upwelling of joy across the entire Scottish nation that the game had caused. Davie was trying to explain that it wasn’t just about the result, but the circumstances – the manner of the win. Three of the four goals were truly things of beauty. The match took place at Glasgow’s Hampden Park in front of a delirious home crowd, screened live and free-to-view in every home and every pub. It followed years and years of failure to qualify – some of the present team being unborn at the time Scotland had last qualified.
Andy nodded good-humouredly, but Davie could tell that he hadn’t yet got his point across. He tried again:
‘I was ten when I first started going to the football. In ‘The Boys Enclosure’ (admission: 9 pence – 5p. in new money). It was always packed solid, but you were always among friends, you roared, you booed, you sang, and when they scored you all swept forward like a mighty wave. Like I said, I was ten, and for the first time I felt a part of a whole. That was what Scotland felt when that lovely fourth goal hit the net in the last minute of extra time: it felt that we were part of a whole. It was a feeling of solidarity.’
‘OK, yeah, I’ve got it now, Davie. Solidarity: maybe I didn’t recognise it ’til you said it. Solidarity eh? I thought that had disappeared back in 1985.’
‘1985?? Ah, you mean Polmaise?’
[Polmaise Colliery, or the remains of it, lay just nine miles away. All through the year-long miners’ strike in 1984-85, the Polmaise miners never posted pickets at the mine gates to try to deter fellow miners from returning to work: they didn’t need to. They knew that Polmaise miners were all, to a man, solidly behind the strike. Polmaise was famous: they’d previously struck for 10 whole months back in 1938; they’d already been out on strike for a fortnight in 1984, before the national miners’ strike was declared. When the national strike was broken, a whole year later, and the union voted for a return to work, Polmaise, alone, stayed out for a further week.]
‘Yeah, I mean Polmaise. That was solidarity, Davie. I was there, you know, with the whole village at the gates to applaud the lads coming off the last shift, when the Thatcher government closed the pit two years later.’
‘Good for you, Andy. I understand: that was solidarity. So, instead, what would you call our nation of leaping hearts when the ref blew the final whistle at Hampden Park the other night?’
‘Maybe Communion? A transcendent thing, shared and remembered. ‘
‘Ah, like Archie Gemmill’s solo goal against the Dutch in the World Cup Finals in Argentina in 1978?’
‘Ha, if you like.’
‘OK, I’ll settle for communion over solidarity. By the way, do you know what William McIlvanney, your favourite Scots author, did when he got the publisher’s advance for his first novel?’
‘Beats me, Davie.’
‘He jacked in his teaching job in Kilmarnock and headed off to watch Scotland and Archie Gemmill in the 1978 World Cup Finals in Argentina.’
Andy smiled, but he was absorbed in watching a Dipper fossicking in the Allanwater shallows over at the opposite bank. Part of the attraction of Dippers is that, like Puffins, they are both comical in appearance and surprisingly successful in their daily tasks. Dippers are about the same size as a thrush, but black and definitely portly in appearance, with a big white bib under their chin. They are called ‘Dippers’ because they constantly bow and nod their heads up and down, like manic Victorian butlers. Yet these clown-like birds are surprisingly swift underwater swimmers and efficient finders of caddisfly larvae on the bottoms of rivers, lochs and burns.
Davie followed Andy’s gaze. ‘That Dipper looks perfectly happy on his own over there. Maybe we don’t really need communion with others?’
‘Ah, but he’s in communion with Nature.’
Guest Writer Times Two: Heroes by Michael Bloor
(Note: We conclude this latest guest week with Mick with two of his micro fictions, which both get a fresh look on the net today. We thank Mick and are always glad to have his work be a part of the site–Leila)
Heroes by Michael Bloor
Patrick, my friend and neighbour, and myself were arguing back and forth about our literary heroes:
is their influence always for the good? I spoke in their defence, citing Robert Burns fostering the belief of every Scot that ‘A Man’s a Man, for A’ That.’
Patrick denied that literary talent necessarily overlaps with moral courage, political acuity, or even a healthy quotum of commonsense. He instanced Conan Doyle, who believed in faeries and dodgy spiritualism, but clinched his case with Kafka’s diaries. The entry for August 2 nd 1914 reads:
‘Germany has declared war on Russia. In the afternoon, swimming lessons.’
And…
Mother and the Minister by Michael Bloor
Sixty years ago, it was still commonplace for ministers in rural Scotland to call on all their parishioners, welcome or not. Mother would seat him at the kitchen table and put the kettle on, while I listened at the door as they discussed father’s behaviour. After one particularly disreputable episode, the visitor concluded:
‘Weel mistress, you’re nay marrit. So my advice wud be just to put him richt oot the door.’
My mother pondered this a moment, ‘Aye, minister, I’ll do as ye say. Can I ask a favour though? Would ye collect his pay packet for me every Saturday?’
Michael Bloor lives in Dunblane, Scotland, where he has discovered the exhilaration of short fiction, with more than a hundred pieces published in Literally Stories, Everyday Fiction, The Copperfield Review, Litro Online, Firewords, The Drabble, The Cabinet of Heed, Moonpark Review and elsewhere (see https://michaelbloor.com).
Guest Writer: Making Chutney by Michael Bloor
(A one-hundred word gem by Mick–Leila)
I’ve been making green tomato chutney. Outside in the street, I see a woman and a small boy. He’s walking unevenly, avoiding cracks in the pavement. His mum gives his hand a mighty tug: mother and son, out-of-step.
Then, I can’t remember what weight of sultanas to add. When I find the yellowed recipe, I see it’s in my mum’s handwriting. She’d spelt ‘tomato’ with an ‘e’ at the end, which upset me a little.
I used to say my mum was a difficult woman, but perhaps she wasn’t all that difficult. Maybe it was just that we were out-of-step?
Michael Bloor lives in Dunblane, Scotland, where he has discovered the exhilaration of short fiction, with more than a hundred pieces published in Literally Stories, Everyday Fiction, The Copperfield Review, Litro Online, Firewords, The Drabble, The Cabinet of Heed, Moonpark Review and elsewhere (see https://michaelbloor.com).
Guest Writer: A Misapprehension by Michael Bloor
(This little one was published on 7 September 2018 by The Drabble–Gotta love them Ponies–Leila)
Beyond the barren rubble of an antique lava-flow, a herd of Icelandic ponies graze on rough pasturage among rashes and dwarf birch. A stallion sniffs the breeze; mares and foals snuffle among the grass and herbs. The stirring and shifting of their manes and tails seem all of a piece with the jagged mountain silhouettes on the horizon and the jumbled lava – a wild, young, restless country. I turn to Guðmundur: ‘Those horses … they’re almost an emblem of freedom.’
Guðmundur paused, smiled and shook his head: ‘My grandfather made his living selling them to work down the Scottish mines.’
Michael Bloor lives in Dunblane, Scotland, where he has discovered the exhilaration of short fiction, with more than a hundred pieces published in Literally Stories, Everyday Fiction, The Copperfield Review, Litro Online, Firewords, The Drabble, The Cabinet of Heed, Moonpark Review and elsewhere (see https://michaelbloor.com).